Best Place to Break Up
Winner: Science Museum of Minnesota
Listen, honey, it's just not working out. See, you're like this 4,000-year-old stone slab of cuneiform, the world's first written language: Your communication skills are primitive. Or you're like the "Deadly Medicine" exhibit about Nazi eugenics. You're a traveling exhibit in the museum that is my life. You're fascinating, I learned some neat things from you, but you were never meant to be a permanent part of my collection, sweetie. That's just the way life is. Our relationship is as dead as that Egyptian mummy over there. Let's go over to the Disease Detectives display downstairs. See, you're like a horrible microbe that ended up in my food after the chef at a restaurant didn't wash his hands. Now you're in my digestive tract, and I'm sick...of you. Really, really sick. You make me puke. And, well, I don't want to puke anymore. Is this making sense? Good. I'm going to see a mountain-climbing movie at the Omnitheater now. Stop crying, the kids on a fieldtrip are staring.
Like I could make this up?
The "best of" also included:
Best Place to Get Arrested for Soliciting Sex in Public -- Mpls/Stpl Lindburgh Terminal almost made it
Best State Fair Food -- walleye on a stick
Best Parking Lot
Best Silver Lining to the 35W Bridge Collapse
Best DMV (yes, they really mean the Dept. Motor Vehicles)
Best Speed Trap
Eclipse Path Maps
2 days ago
1 comment:
Seeing this just brought back memories of "Friends" and Ross being a paleontologist. He'd probably find the Science Museum romantic instead of a good place to break up.
It's such a geeky science place, maybe it's #1 because it's the one place where a guy wouldn't suspect he's going to get dumped and would definitely show up....
And it has nothing to do with sports.
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